Ask Bish – Masturbation With A Marker Pen
Advice on why masturbation with an orange marker pen is perhaps not a great idea
Hi, so I’m only 13, and I wanted to explore masturbation. But I couldn’t find anything to use. I did something very silly and used an orange marker ( with the cap on of course) to masturbate. The marker is about 5 inches long but not very thick, and inserted almost the entire thing into my vagina, once I removed the marker, I noticed blood. I then used an old towel and wiped, just to check, and there was blood. I haven’t gotten my first period yet, but I’ve had discharge. I know ur not a medic, but I just wanted ur opinion. Please reply 🙂 thanks.
Thanks for your question.
It’s totally fine for you to explore masturbation at 13 if , however you’ve probably already guessed that it’s not a great idea using a marker pen to do it. You probably haven’t damaged your vagina in a serious way but you really should probably use the pen for, you know, writing?
Masturbation is fine
Masturbation is totally fine and normal. I don’t know for sure when most people start masturbating but many young people do masturbate around your age. It’s exciting to explore how things feel, to find out more about your body and to learn what being turned on (or sexually aroused) feels like.
It doesn’t mean you’re ready to have sex *with* someone but as you say it was something you wanted to explore. This is fine to do even if you haven’t had your first period, but not everyone will feel the same. That’s cool. It’s not compulsory and everyone will have their own idea about when the right time to start masturbating is.
But only if you do it safely
Although masturbation is fine, it’s really important that you do it safely. Particularly when you are exploring masturbation inside the vagina. The walls of the vagina are very strong and stretchy (err childbirth) but they can be damaged by sharp things. Penises and sex toys which are designed to go inside the vagina are very very smooth. Orange marker pens are not. You could have very slightly cut yourself inside the vagina.
The vagina can get damaged
When the vagina is really turned on it gets wet, this is something you may well have felt. The wetness prevents friction by lubricating the walls of the vagina against anything that enters it during sex. When people insert things inside their vagina (things which are meant to go inside the vagina) they often add a bit more wetness such as water based lubricant (something we can buy from shops) or saliva. This can prevent damage or soreness.
Also at the opening to the vagina is the vaginal corona (this used to be called the hymen) which is thin folds of mucous membrane surrounding the opening. When someone puts something inside the vagina for the first time, if the vagina isn’t properly aroused (turned on) it can be less relaxed and a bit less wet which means that the corona can get damaged. This might cause a bit of blood.
So, what do I think?
As you say, I’m not a medic so what I’m about to say is a total guess. If it only bled after that one time then it may well have healed up and I think you’ll probably be fine.
However I do think it’s a good idea to talk to someone you know and trust in real life about this. Is there a parent or carer or wise looking relative/adult in your life you could talk to? It’s not easy talking to adults about masturbation when you’re 13 and whether you think you can depends on your parents. You could also see your school nurse, or even head to your local young people’s clinic if you wanted more re-assurance.
If you decide to masturbate again soon
If you feel like you want to give it another go please put the pen away. Maybe try not masturbating inside the vagina but on the outside. Touching the skin around the clitoris or the vaginal lips can feel really nice. If then you wanted to explore inside the vagina you could just use your fingers, but maybe trim your finger nails first.
If something feels painful or sore please stop. It may mean that you aren’t quite ready for inserting your fingers in your vagina yet.
Hope this helps!